What to do in the first week after a death

The first week after a death can feel like two things at once: a blur and a list. People call, papers appear and decisions arrive faster than you can think. This article breaks the week into small pieces. You will not need every step, and you can ask others to take many of them.

If you are reading this in the first hours, start with the first section and stop there. The rest will still be here tomorrow.

Day one: only what cannot wait

On the first day, there are only a few things that truly matter.

• Make the right first call. If the death was unexpected and happened at home, call 911. If the person was in hospice, call the hospice team instead. In a hospital or care home, the staff will guide you.
• Speak up about donation. If the person wanted to be an organ or tissue donor, tell the staff right away, because timing matters.
• Tell the closest people. Call immediate family. Then choose one or two friends to share the news more widely, so you are not making every call yourself.
• Look after dependents. Make sure children, anyone who relied on the person for care and any pets are safe and looked after.

That is enough for one day. If you can, eat something and try to rest.

Days two and three: choices about care and the service

Find their wishes

Before you make arrangements, look for anything the person left behind: a will, a prepaid funeral plan, a note, an email or even a conversation someone remembers. A prepaid plan may already name a funeral home. A will may name an executor, the person who will settle the estate later. You do not need to read the will in detail yet. Just find it and keep it safe.

Choose a funeral home or cremation provider

It is fine to call more than one provider. Funeral homes in the US must give you an itemized price list when you ask in person, and must share prices over the phone if you call and ask. You can choose only the items you want. If a family member or friend is good with numbers, ask them to help compare.

Some questions worth asking:

• What is included in the basic services fee?
• What does direct cremation or direct burial cost, and what does it include?
• Can we hold a memorial service later, somewhere else?
• How many certified death certificates should we order, and what does each one cost?

Decide what kind of goodbye fits

A service can be large or small, religious or not, soon or weeks from now. Some families hold a private burial or cremation first and a gathering later, when people can travel and plans feel less rushed. Choose what feels true to the person and possible for you.

Days four and five: paperwork that helps later

Death certificates

The funeral home usually files the death certificate and can order certified copies. You will need them for insurance claims, banks, pensions and more. Ordering a few extra now is often easier than ordering more later, and some organizations will return a certified copy if you ask.

Start a simple log

Get a notebook or open a note on your phone. Each time you make a call, write the date, the organization, the person you spoke with and what happens next. Keep every receipt for funeral costs and anything you pay on behalf of the person. This habit will save you hours in the months ahead.

Secure the home

If the person lived alone, lock the home, collect the mail and make sure nothing needs urgent care, such as food in the fridge or plants. Keep valuables and important papers somewhere safe. It is best not to give belongings away yet.

Days six and seven: a few important notifications

• Social Security. The funeral home usually reports the death. Ask them to confirm. If they did not, call Social Security at 1-800-772-1213. A surviving spouse or child may qualify for a one-time $255 payment and survivor benefits.
• Life insurance. Call each insurer you know about and ask how to begin a claim. Ask the person’s employer about group life insurance too.
• Employer. If the person was working, contact their HR team about final pay and benefits.
• Veterans. If the person served, ask the funeral home about VA burial benefits and a burial flag.

What can wait until after the first week

Many things feel urgent but are not. These can usually wait a few weeks:

• Closing bank accounts. It is often better to wait until the executor has legal authority.
• Canceling the person’s phone or email. You may need them for sign in codes.
• Sorting clothes and belongings.
• Selling a car or a home.
• Understanding probate. Read about it when you are ready, and talk with an attorney if needed.

Looking after yourself this week

Grief is physical as well as emotional. You may feel exhausted, restless or numb. You may forget things you just heard. All of this is common.

Say yes to help, and make it specific: “Could you pick up the death certificates?” or “Could you call Aunt Rose?” People usually want to help and simply do not know how.

If you are in crisis or thinking about harming yourself, in the US you can call or text 988 at any hour to reach the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline. In an emergency, call 911.

A plan and a person

If you would like a plan for your situation, Gracekeeps Loss Care builds one from a few questions and adds a care specialist to help with the calls, letters and forms. Our longer guide, what to do when someone dies, covers the months that follow, and our first week checklist is ready to print.

This article is general information, not legal, financial or medical advice. Rules differ by state and by situation. For advice about your circumstances, talk with a licensed professional.